Ranty Friday — Dear Jamelia

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warning this post contains swearing.  Lots of swearing.  All the swears.  If swearing offends then please leave now and Google some kitten pictures which is what I shall now be doing in an effort to calm down. 

Jamelia telling us we should be banned from the High Street

oh love.

I do not think it’s right to facilitate people living an unhealthy lifestyle. In the same way [that] I don’t believe that a size zero should be available, it’s not a healthy size for an average woman to be.

I don’t believe they [high street stores] should be providing clothes for below that range or above that range. Yes, have specialist shops but you should feel uncomfortable if you are unhealthy … to be available in every high street store, I don’t think that’s right

What have you started with your, quite frankly, fatuous comments?.

Really?

Seriously?

Do you have any idea how utterly condescending you sound?

I tell you what, love (and do forgive my patronising tone but, quite frankly, you started it) why don’t you take your size 8 skinny frame and fuck off?

This could quite possibly be the shortest blog post ever as I just want it to be made up simply of the above sentence.  Nothing else.

Do you seriously think that I walk down a High Street, see a pair of jeans in a size 22 and think “ooh I must go home and fill my face with cake so I can fit into those”.    No, love, I go home after shopping on the High Street and fill my face with cake because I am sick of being insulted on a daily basis by people like you and your patronising tone.

Having clothes shops on the high street that cater for those above a size 16 is no more fuelling an obesity crisis than living three doors down from an off licence is making people alcoholics.

I was 11 stone at 15.  I remember writing it in my diary.  I wasn’t proud.   I am not proud now, but do you know what I came away from a day in a spa this weekend a bit more proud of who I am in my own skin.      That actually I am not being judged by the clothes I wear or by the size of my arse.   For three days I felt good.  I even wrote about it here.  And now, thanks to you, I feel like a complete failure.  Again.   And God knows I don’t need much at the moment to make me feel like a complete failure.

And you see Jamelia the more you are made to believe you are a failure because the latest diet or health regime hasn’t worked.  The less you hear compliments.   The more you hate yourself.   And the more people like you make comments like this that self hatred deepens.   Actual proper self loathing stemming again from being told by somebody “who is paid for their opinion” that we are shameful and should hide away from the public.  Should not be allowed on the High Street for fear of infecting the minds of the skinny folk.    That what we have, a large arse, is contagious.

Do me a favour and just shut the fuck up, will you?

Did you actually think this idea through?

As a for instance, I buy a lot of my clothes in Marks and Spencers.   Typically when I want something specific, I know I can get it there.   Having picked up said item and put it in my trolley ( I always have a trolley, I can’t think if I have to shop without a trolley) I then wander around and spend, roughly, a hundred or so quid on food and other stuff that grabs my fancy.   I work hard enough that I am able to do that, to treat my family to a box of fancy pre cut melon, or a bag of Percy Pigs, or maybe a new jumper for Mr B.  Or a pack of socks for J.

That spending is part of a larger economy.   If I take my sorry fat arse off to a specialist shop that only sells clothes for sorry fat arses what does that do to Marks and Spencer’s profit margin?   And also to Tesco who are already posting losses of £63 Billion today.  Without my grabbing of something from Florence and Fred when I am in Tesco doing the weekly shop those profits drops are going to continue.

Your  apology on Wednesday morning was no better

“I didn’t make it clear on the show that I was talking about extremes, I was talking about above size 20 and below size six, those sizes being available en masse,

Since when has a size 20 been extreme?  It isn’t.    And actually nor really is a size six.   Whilst it could be argued that some women can help themselves to not be a size 20, many many women can’t help being a size 6.   It’s insulting to them to suggest otherwise.

Why can’t we send shops that only stock clothes for skinny women away from the High Street?  As over half the female population are deemed by the fashion industry to be “Plus Sized” why cant the other half be the ones to leave?

Next you’ll be suggesting that High Streets are devoid of restaurants in case people get hungry and it pushes them up a dress size.

What about pubs?  An alcoholic might see one and be tempted to leave sobriety behind.

Being healthy is about your whole lifestyle.   Is the skinny model who is booked by fashion houses to model their latest clothes but who lives on cocaine and cigarettes healthier than me?   Is the size four anorexic who is convinced they are fat and who lives on half an apple a day healthier than me?

To look at them you might think they are healthier and therefore deemed worthy of buying their clothes on the High Street.  But are they really any healthier than me?  Judge me on my size and deem me instantly less healthy and therefore shove me off to a specialist shop to buy my wardrobe.

Lucky you Jamelia that you don’t have to be shamed about your weight.  I don’t know if you are lucky enough to have that enviable figure by nature, ie you can eat what you like when you like and nothing sticks to your hips,  or if you have to watch what you eat, or if you eat what you like but have a personal trainer who comes in four times a week to help you maintain your figure.  I don’t know.  I don’t care.  I don’t judge people on appearances.

And quite frankly I would rather you didn’t either.


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  • Well bloody said mummy barrow !!! I have been waiting for this post and its says exactly what lots of women feel and would like to say x love you just the way you are xxx

  • I missed these comments from her and quite frankly I am glad I did or else like you I would have felt like shit. People like this should learn to engage their brains before stating these frankly laughable opinions out loud. Methinks she may lose a few fans over this and rightly so.

    Ooooh this has fired me up for the day, I was feeling a bit meh and listless but now I am pissed off, and a pissed off me gets lots more done lol

    Amanda xxx

  • Well said lady. I always find it sad and ironic that women’s greatest enemies are often …. other women. Raising my kids in such a judgemental world scares me. x

  • Another great read about the backlash towards this woman’s comments. We live is such a judgemental world, it’s scary. I wrote a post entitled “You Wouldn’t Know” on the back of the We Are The They hashtag, because basing judgement on looks alone is bollocks.

  • Oh how I love this…and you for shouting out about it
    I find it sad and insulting that people like Jamelia are ‘paid for their comments’ and they clearly don’t have any understanding of the real, wide world in which we live.
    It’s so sad to think we live in such a judgemental world, where we are constantly berated about the way we look and what we eat and more often than not by other women.
    Very well said xx

  • So well said. Her statement made me so mad, as a size 18 I can say that plus sizes are not ‘readily available’ on the high street and it’s a constant battle to find clothes. To make make people who fall in certain size categories shop elsewhere is absurd and I’m sure these words will haunt her career for some time to come.

  • I’m size 18 and at 6ft it’s a nightmare already. I too swore at her comments. Great, make me feel worse, stupid bint!

    I’ve been tiny, and now I’m huge. I’ve had Ana and bullemia and I can tell you the tiny end of the clothes shop is as miserable as the chunky end. I am almost happy where I am, 16 would be nice as my clothing choices would double. .. but I didn’t need some dumb famous trout telling me I should be ashamed.

  • Well said. Those sorts of comments contribute to more body-shaming, lack of self-esteem and poor self image – and women have enough of that anyway, with impossible, unattainable, unrealistic notions of a ‘perfect’ body. I’m a size 14-16 and apparently that’s plus-size too in many places. Sigh. xx

  • Eugh this is so fucking irritating. A size 16 is the UK female average. So basically she’s saying anyone just over average – or just about the standard – should have to shop elsewhere? What a load of horse shit!

    It’s exactly stuff like this that perpetuates unrealistic sterotypes!

  • All I can say is YUCK! I missed her comments but reading your post has got me raging alongside with you and also feeling a bit baffled. Go to a specialist shop if you’re below a 6 and above a 20?? I can’t even fathom how this would work? Where are all the specialist shops? Also, shops already carry ranges from petite to plus size. Is she seriously saying something along the lines of let’s shame people by making them go to “other” places. UGH UGH UGH it just gets more ridiculous and stupid the more I think about it. Thanks for getting me all riled up, lol! xx

  • It is not so much that Jamilia is being paid to air views that could be deemed sizest in public that bothers me as much as her lack of knowledge and understanding. I have spent decades eating minimal portions and skipping meals, instead of being a size zero I am the opposite over weight size 16/18. My body refuses to burn calories because it knows it may not see food for a week. If only this role model had bothered to research the topic rather than forming a judgement based opinion it may create an opinion worth broadcasting as well as helping others to understand the complexities of size.

  • Great post. I didn’t see this air, only read about it and frankly was stumped by the statement and the subsequent ‘apology’. I don’t know why I always had the impression Jamelia was one of the pop birds with a good head on her shoulders. Guess I was mistaken.

    I don’t mean to play the race card but it surprises me that she’s making this type of judgement coming from an African Caribbean background where generally women of all shapes and sizes are not just accepted but celebrated (large arses rule!) and nobody gets pushed to the back or edited from the shopping rails! I only wish she had used her platform to promote diversity and positive body image, rather than spout this narrow minded nonsense.

    Regarding weight issues and the health factor, Michelle at Mummy from the Heart wrote a good post about this, worth checking out too x

  • Well thank you Tanya, some people are so misinformed. As for calling size 6 or size 20 extreme it is just laughable. I think she may have just put a nail in her own coffin. Mich x

  • I have completely missed all of this. Do you think she says these sorts of things for ratings? I would rather believe that than believe she could be so narrow minded. Don’t you EVER feel bad for being who you are T because you are an amazing person who works tirelessly for others. And I think you look amazing too x