I see you have a book out on Thursday and as such you are doing the rounds drumming up publicity for it. So I guess you really have no choice but to talk about the book, your life, and more importantly your marriage. And it is that more than anything that has made me feel the need to write to you today.
The headlines screaming out are that you have been quoted as saying of your wife “she has lost her spark”.
Have you ever stopped to think why? You mention that your wife has suffered from depression, possibly for her whole life. That must be incredibly debilitating for her and my heart breaks thinking about her this week. And I can’t help but wondered if that depression and loss of a spark has been caused by your behaviour over the past 40 years.
For this week, not only is your private life and your marriage being trawled over but, the photos that accompany some of the headlines show you kissing other women with whom you have had affairs. So is it any wonder Lady Jones is feeling less than sparkly? To have to see those, to know that they are out there in the public domain. Again.
You say your marriage is “rock solid” well probably as your wife is so demoralised by all of this that she feels there is no alternative but than to stay married to you. The idea of divorcing you and starting again is possibly too much to contemplate. Easier just to stay at home and keep the front door shut. To keep away from prying eyes of the media and not read the column inches.
To not think what you might be doing whilst away on tour as women still throw not only underwear at you but also themselves. The easiest way to deal with that is to ignore it. Shut it out completely and get on with life and carry on being a mum and just Mrs Jones. You claim that Lady Jones “was never happy being out and about, I think she was happier to stay in the house”. Well wouldn’t you be if you knew that whenever you went out your picture would then be in the paper alongside a Miss World contest?
Men like you do make me really cross. You seem to think that having affairs is insignificant and can be swept under the carpet because the old adage of “what happens on tour stay on tours” has come into play and that if it isn’t happening on your doorstep then it will all be fine when you get home to your wife. After all your marriage is solid, right?
Ask yourself this, Tom. If your marriage is so solid why have you had so many affairs?
If this quote is true it makes me more than cross, it makes me bloody livid in fact:
Linda is the love of my life, and she still is, even though she doesn’t look like she did. I don’t look like I did either, but I try my best. She’s lost her spark.’
The implication being that whilst you still try and make an effort, she doesn’t. Is that what you are saying here, Tom? Is it?
It is easy to make an effort when Dolce and Gabbana are throwing suits at you and when you appear on stage women will be throwing themselves at you too. Chucking underwear at you and generally massaging your ego. It’s easy when you have a team behind the scenes pandering to your every whim and who’s job it is to make you look the best you can look.
It is not so easy when you are a lady of a certain age who knows her outfit, looks and marriage are going to be dissected at every opportunity. When you just know that no matter how hard you try it’ll still be picked over. When you see those women throwing themselves at your husband and it reminds you of when it has happened in the past and wondering if it might happen again.
If you gave it all up for a year, Tom, quietly slipped away and lived where nobody knew you and the pair of you went out as a couple in jeans and t-shirts every Saturday night for a pint in the local pub, or for Chinese, I am fairly certain your wife’s spark would slowly come back.
Why not give it ago because sure as eggs is eggs after this book tour and the resulting media coverage of your marriage is done your wife’s spark won’t be lost, it’ll be in a box and buried at the bottom of a bloody hole.
Photo of Tom Jones courtesy of Shutterstock.