I have never…..


Whilst driving into London on Saturday we drove past Harrods.   “There it is kids” I exclaimed, as they had been talking about it a few miles before.

I have never been to Harrods

exclaimed Mr B.

I was dumbstruck  (note that in your diary.   It doesn’t happen very often).  Mr B had never been to Harrods!

I don’t know why it surprised it.   I am sure millions haven’t been, even those that have lived in London, as Mr B has done.

It got me thinking about things I haven’t done.     So I thought I would share a few:

  • Been to New York
  • Mastered the art of snowboarding, surfing or wind-surfing
  • Been to university
  • Done a parachute jump
  • Learnt to juggle
  • Pulled a pint of beer, worked behind a bar or been a waitress
  • Eaten in Nandos
  • Been paintballing
  • Seen a Bond film from start to finish
  • Seen any of the Star Wars or Godfather films either
  • Done a job that involved selling anything
  • Been elected to any position
  • Fallen off a horse
  • Ridden on a motorbike
  • Had a drink thrown over me
  • Been in a car accident
  • Been a smoker
  • Whistled with two fingers in my mouth

What have you never done?


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  • Woken up refreshed
    Been in a glider
    Worn boxer shorts
    Cooked Sunday lunch
    Enjoyed gardening
    Owned a dog
    Seen a Harry Potter film or read any of the books
    Painted a picture
    Scored better than 90 at golf
    Been to University
    Lost at Risk ;))

    I’ve done pretty much everything else…………………………!

    • Never lost at Risk?


      Might I remind you of an incident when I was about 14? Tis the stuff of legends that thrashing you received.

      Interesting though isnt it? The things that you haven’t done, such as cooked Sunday lunch, but you have driven a classic car to Sydney which included three weeks of driving through China!

  • How long have we got? Here’s a selection [my life has been very dull – so far!]

    Ridden a horse
    Learned to swim properly
    Been in a glider
    Been to Harrods!
    Helped someone who’s wounded if there’s anyone nearer than I
    Eaten an oyster [Have eaten snail soup]
    Learned to play a musical instrument – unless a kazoo counts.
    Learned to skate
    Ditto ski
    Fully understood PCs, I-pods, Blackberries, etc., etc. [Do like Hornby Dublo and these new Biro pens]
    And as for digital TV – words fail me.
    Learned to appreciate coffee American style ditto American Budweiser which has been described as like making love in a canoe!
    Trawling my memory!

    • I love this list!

      Truth be told, I dont understand computers or BlackBerries either.

  • I have never:

    cooked a roast
    passed my driving test
    been sunburnt

    Running out of ideas now, clearly I have done a few things!

  • I have never learnt to ride a bike and I have never smoked not even one cigarette!

  • I have never …

    Swum the Atlantic.
    Eaten a car.
    Slept with a prominent member of the royal family.
    Conquered the planet Zarb.
    Traveled in time.
    Become invisible.
    Played cards with a zebra.

    On a more serious note I have never …

    Played the lottery
    Placed a bet

    And (getting very serious for a moment)…

    have never, and will never watch a horse race because of the number of fatalities every year in the name of ‘sport’. See http://www.horsedeathwatch.com/

    Oh, and I’ve never been mistaken for anyone famous, rich or good-looking.


    • These are superb.

      But you ARE famous. You are that bloke who has one of his paintings hanging in our living room!

  • LOVE this post. How can you NOT have seen Star Wars or Godfather?! I have trilogy -must send to you!
    Here’s mine..

    1. Broken a bone
    2. Watched the film Rocky
    3. Been skiing
    4. Laughed at Mrs Browns Boys or Russel Howard
    5. Been inside St Paul’s Cathedral or Westminster Abbey
    6. Finished a copy of Psychologies magazine
    7. Prepared a Lobster for eating
    8. Been fired

    • Wow! Great list!

      Funny you should say Russell Howard, went to the O2 and didnt laugh once. Seiously unfunny. As is Ricky Gervais.

  • I’ve never been to Harrods, either. I’ve no inclination to. It’s only house of Fraser with added gimmick.
    Nor have I flown. I’ve been abroad, but only ever by ferry.
    And I’ve never learnt to drive. For ages I didn’t really need to and couldn’t afford a car, anyhow. Now I do have time to learn and would find it useful, living in the sticks now, but I don’t trust myself.

  • I have never –

    Broken a bone
    Ridden a horse
    Learned to ski
    Had a paper round
    Been to America
    Taken illegal drugs
    Played golf

    Too late now for most of these… but I could still get a paper round.

  • I’ve never:
    Seen a single episode of CSI, Lost, 24 or The Sopranos, or seen any of the Star Wars films all the way through.
    Been to Blackpool
    Tasted gin
    Played a board game with my kids without someone having a mardy
    Broken a bone in my body

  • I have never…
    Seen the Sound of Music or Star Wars
    Also never learned to ride a bike
    Run a marathon (or half marathon..or a mile)
    Photocopied my backside
    Been stuck in a lift
    Mastered liquid eyeliner
    Been in a hot air balloon
    Been any good at maths
    Touched a snake!

  • What I love about this list is you see something in a later list and then you think “Well, it’s not in their list, so they must have done it”. I have images of lots of people sat on photocopiers clutching snakes now….

  • I have never

    Ridden in a Mini
    Used a power saw
    Owned a reptile as a pet
    Dated more than one person at a time
    Been to Canada or Mexico and I live in America
    Eaten frog’s legs (and I’m a chef)
    Made Angel Hair Pasta successfully (did I mention the chef thing?)
    Been rock climbing, surfing, or skydiving
    Lost my ability to quote movie dialogue and song lyrics from the 1980s
    Been unfaithful in any relationship
    Been to Disneyworld (but remedying that this Christmas)
    Had the patience for any child but my own.

  • ha ha! the drawing looks fab!
    until today i’ve never seen a duck riding a bike! and then I drew one.

    I have also never;
    Been to New York
    Been to university
    Done a parachute jump
    Pulled a pint of beer, worked behind a bar or been a waitress
    Been paintballing
    Seen a Bond film from start to finish
    Seen any of the Star Wars or Godfather films either
    Ridden on a motorbike
    Been a smoker
    Whistled with two fingers in my mouth

    • That is because YOU drew it. I am loving having you as my artist in residence 🙂 !!