Ranty Friday Elton vs DolceGabbana


Picture Credit: PA
Picture Credit: PA

So it’s been handbags at dawn this week between Elton John and Messrs Dolce and Gabbana over this comment in an interview with the designers in Italy’s Panorama magazine:

We oppose gay adoptions. The only family is the traditional one.  No chemical offsprings and rented uterus: life has a natural flow, there are things that should not be changed.”

Dolce then added that procreation “must be an act of love”, saying:

You are born to a mother and a father – or at least that’s how it should be.

I call children of chemistry, synthetic children. Rented uterus, semen chosen from a catalog.

Gabbana added: “The family is not a fad. In it there is a supernatural sense of belonging.”

Now I have to nail my colours to the mast here and say that I don’t agree with any of that sentiment.  I believe children should be cared for and above all else, loved.    Nothing else matters to me, I don’t care who those “parents” are, what matters is that the child grows up nurtured, cherished, well balanced and with a deep sense of identity and love.

If those parents happen to be of the same sex, well that is just fine in my book.   How they got to hold that baby in their arms is of no concern to me.

Just this week we have seen yet another case of hideous neglect surrounding a five year old boy.  A boy who didn’t know what a bath was for and who had no toothbrush.  Who slept in a bed covered in dog excrement.   Who said that despite being good Santa didn’t come to his house anymore.   A house that he lived in with his mother and his stepfather.   A man and a woman.  Seen by many as “traditional”.

Is that better than a family where both the parents are the same sex?

How can it be?

No, I believe Dolce and Gabbana are wrong.  Very wrong.  I know several same sex couples, whom I adore, and who have the most gorgeous children.   I am talking about you My Two Mums.   They are incredible parents.  Their Youtube channel is full of adventures the three of them have as a family.

How in anybody’s book is that wrong?

What I don’t agree with though is what Elton John has done with his #BoycottDolceGabbana campaign.

Reading the article, Elton responded with this:

How dare you refer to my beautiful children as ‘synthetic’.

And shame on you for wagging your judgemental little fingers at IVF – a miracle that has allowed legions of loving people, both straight and gay, to fulfil their dream of having children.

Your archaic thinking is out of step with the times, just like your fashions. I shall never wear Dolce and Gabbana ever again. #BoycottDolceGabbana.

Now I get his annoyance.   He is right, with his first two statements.  Up to a point.

You see this is a matter of opinion.   And whilst Elton John might think that Dolce and Gabbana’s thinking is “archaic” and “out of step with the times” it is their opinion.  To which they are entitled.  Yes, I know the designers are gay and a lot of their customer base is gay and they have received a huge amount of support from the gay community over the years but bundling in in this way can’t be the way to deal with a difference of opinion.

Even if we disagree.

Which I do.

That doesn’t make it wrong, it makes it a different opinion.    What I don’t agree with is then Elton John mounting a campaign to boycott the brand.

Yes, there are probably hundreds of people tweeting using the # who have never bought a piece of Dolce and Gabbana clothing, nor will they ever.   Many probably hadn’t even heard of the duo before this but they are now jumping on a # bandwagon.

There are however people jumping on this who have heard of the duo, and who probably have bought their stuff and this is now gathering pace.   All week there has been another celeb tweeting #BoycottDolceGabbana.

It makes me uncomfortable if I am honest. It is tantamount to bullying.

Maybe the views are out of step with the majority but this is their opinion, and they should be able to live in a world where they are able to voice that opinion without worrying that their business is going to suffer.   Because, what’s the alternative?   Voice a lie?  Keep quiet?

Nobody wants to live in a world where those last two things are the case, surely?

Wouldn’t it have been nicer if Elton John had said something like this instead? Had tried to educate not bully? #ComeForTeaAndCakeAndSeeHowGorgeousOur”Synthetic”BabiesAreDolceGabbana or even something like #OurBabyIsNotSyntheticButLovedComeSeeForYourselves

Wouldn’t that have been nicer? If he could have used this opportunity to show them that these babies are not synthetic, but real little human beings that are adored by their parents.  Educated Dolce and Gabbana.  Maybe changed their view from being archaic to more in line with current thinking.

That maybe in a month or two Dolce and Gabbana had maybe seen that their opinion was out of step with current thinking.  Or maybe not.  That they still held that view but weren’t afraid to voice it, and that we were able to have a healthy debate on it.  Not carry on encouraging bullying.

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  • Thank you for your lovely mention of us. This is a great post and I hope many read it and understand how easy it is to jump on a bandwagon. You articulate the situation very well.

  • Well said, as usual. How good to hear a voice of reason, understanding and intelligence, thank you.