I need to explain my un-authorised absences over the past few weeks first of all. For the past month I have been suffering from “cluster headaches”. A right royal pain in the
arse head which are a bit like an ice cream brain freeze, eight or ten times a day and last about half an hour, well for me they are. For many other people they can present differently and the cause is not known. I am sure stress plays a factor. As does never waking up naturally and constantly thinking. I am getting more and more convinced that my brain is just tired from all the thinking it does.
Not intelligent or critical thinking, don’t be ridiculous. But thinking about what we are having for dinner, what needs to be done around the house, who is where, how can I catch up with the friends I never get to see, the emails I need to answer, blog posts written…. the list is endless and part of me does wonder if my brain is just complaining about the almighty strain I put on it.
So whilst I battle those, and the tablets I am taking that turn me into a zombie (“these tablets may cause drowsiness” is the biggest understatement of the year) I am trying to have half an hour removed from the world. I would go and sit in the bath expect our bath is hideous and doesn’t really work as a relaxing bath (floor to ceiling white tiles, two person bath, combi boiler that can’t cope with the demand for hot water needed to fill it) so I have only been in once in the ten years we have lived here. What we do have though is the pond, which I wrote about the other day, and various other amazing woodland areas round and about that are ripe for a wander around.
Which leads me to this morning, back from the hour long school run at 8.30 I would normally head home but today I had grabbed my camera and headed back to Fleet Pond. To other side of it, and the bit nearest our house. I only met two other people and the peace was extraordinary. It really was a little oasis of calm.
Yes it was freezing. No I didn’t have a coat. Nor proper boots to tackle the mud. But I only needed half an hour so whilst standing on the edge I snapped some pics of the birds coming and going. Followed by some bits on the way back.
I can’t say any of it has made my headaches go away, and I still have a packed day and weekend but getting out in the fresh air, feeling cold and then warming up really has made a difference this morning.