The perfect Cheeky bacon butty.

Having reviewed sausages last week Cheeky has been begging since to review another meat product for my blog.   Since International Bacon Day is around now it seemed appropriate to do a bacon sandwich for him.

There is a formula that according to Leeds University researchers that reflects the perfect bacon sandwich:

It is N = C + {fb (cm) . fb (tc)} + fb (Ts) + fc . ta

For the mathematically challenged, the formula for perfection uses two or three back bacon rashers, cooked under a preheated oven grill for seven minutes at around 240c (475f).

The bacon should then be placed between two slices of good quality bread, which should be 1cm to 2cm thick.

Out of interest, N = force in Newtons required to break the cooked bacon. C = Newtons required to break uncooked bacon, fb = function of the bacon type, cm = cooking method, tc = cooking time, Ts = serving temperature, fc = function of the condiment/filling effect and ta = time or duration of application of condiment/filling.


Now I cannot say anything about what this says about Leeds University as Mr B went there.  As did many of his friends.   So I would have to believe, as stated, that this is the result of 700 variations of bread and tyes of bacon tested on 50 volunteers.  And not, as I suspect, four drunk blokes falling out of The Faversham pub and firing up the microwave back in their room in Bodington Hall.

I explained this formula to Cheeky and he licked his lips in anticipation of 700 bacon buns.   He looked disappointed when I said there were only three and that Mr B and I needed one each to cure our hangovers.

Cheeky was impressed though that we had 32 rashers of Sainsburys bacon.  He isn’t too fussy about the butty element of that equation.

Cheeky set to work frying the bacon:

not that he will be eating the fried variety.  He is watching his weight.  No, he was having the rashers done in the microwave:

The beauty of bacon is that it doesn’t take long to cook and it was soon in the bun and on a plate.   Cheeky looked very impressed:

If Cheeky could talk he would say “lip smackingly good”

So I think this proves that we have another resounding success.

The bacon wasn’t too salty (Cheeky likes to limit his intake so he doesn’t get high blood pressure.  Always a concern as he is part Jack Russell and generally hyper) and nor was it too fatty either.  Just enough fat to add flavour but no so much that you felt you had to cut it off.

Does anybody know where I can buy another 699 buns on a Sunday?


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  • Well I must say that cheeky seemed to enjoy the sandwich. Very cute. The maths formula is totally over my head and to think this is an area of study!

  • Cheeky is the cutest thing ever. So jealous of British Bacon (American stuff is so fatty-good but I like your version). Love the maths lesson too!